Demonic Angel

It's a weird realization really. One minute I'm this kid always waiting to be all grown up. Now it's like it's all going too fast. The time spent in MSJ was fun, the school gave me a chance to explore myself as a person. Challenged me in a lot of ways, considering the differences in culture and tradition. I gained friends that I could truly trust, the thought of the possibility of us separating is heart aching. I once went through the process of leaving my friends in the Philippines and that was painful, I guess I'm afraid to go through it all over again.

Life in the Philippines was great, don't get me wrong I loved it. Every bit, well except for the asshole encounter, but besides that life was great. I miss all my friends...

I can't believe im graduating next WEEK!!
Im excited but then after that i have exams. LOL.

I keep thinking... after year 12...
University...
then what?
What happens next?

An awkward thinking..


| The Move |

The move to Australia gave me a chance to grow closer to my parents, made me see each little progress my little sister develops. Me and mum we're able to heal the pain we caused each other in the past, well more like me causing pain to her. The funny thing is that, being younger I came to a certain point when I was right and my mother wasn't, that she completely made judgments on her own observation. Admitting that everything was my fault to her was the most hard thing I've done in my life. But at the same time I was thankful that she was right, and she took her advantage of fixing up my life for me.

My dad, got a new job but it's in Philippines. God.. I'm so happy that we are still financially capable, but it's been so hard. Everytime they come back I get used to the fact that they are there, and before I know it they are going again. Despite the fact that this is the situation, in my own little mind I know that, even though it is hard for my parents to leave me here once I graduate highschool, hard for my mum especially because of the divided attention, I know that they are doing this for me, for me to be able to study in university.

Bo and muffin are going as well :( huhu
SOMEONE BUY ME A PUG!! DAMN IT.

| The Stress |

So.. year 12 gave me the most tiring part of my whole life (so far) and I've always been constantly reminded that I had to get a high grade to show my appreciation for everything my parents have done. I just hope that when i don't get the score I expected, and I don't get the score to get into Uni, I hope that I won't fall apart. I mean...come on man. I worked so hard, and if i dont get it, then that would just be too painful for me.. all the hard work.

I saw my Media folio grade by accident, okay.. here's the story. I wasn't supposed to see it, because VCAA are supposedly to assess it and then I get my score. My teacher was photocopying my folio and she asked me to fill out a form so enter 'Top Designs' (only top folios are chosen to do this - only 3 we're able to enter and I'm one of them!!), and then i had to enter details like the size of my product :D so i had to look into my folio... hehehe and then BOOM myt criteria sheet was showing at front :D there are 5 different criteria that all of us have to follow. (I never even looked at this page when she gave it to us at the start of the year - lol) In each criteria you are assessed of how well you did, 5 being the perfect score and 1 being the lowest. I saw...

BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH | 5
BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH | 5
BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH | 5
BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH | 5
BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH | 4

Okay it's not all 5s but what the heck, im happy :D

Well there were instances we're i had to go through bullying. Why is always fat ugly people that bully me? LOL. My theory is that If i have nothing nice to say to someone then there isn't any point of saying it at all unless I was defending my self, when the little shits have poked the bear subsequently. Well... theres this girl seriously, agh. I didn't want to say anything because i knew if i said something then i would regret it, because she kept picking on me seriously, and i think it filled me up I was furious. Out of that tears of anger rolled down my cheeks like a waterfall. You should have seen it, it made me so happy that my firned were there to support me, they were all so ANGRY. hahaha. they went around the school. See, i have told my very close friend, Lily, the school captain of my school, when the bullying happened, every since it started, and whn i cried she full on yelled and talked to them what could happen because of what they are doing. LOL.

And being immature they stopped talking to me. OMG man.. what the hell how old are you 10? "You're not my friend anymore, I'll tell on you" *little girl voice*

| End of year |

There are going to be so many things that will Happen!!! and im anxious.
(1) My 18th birthday is in 52 days. FOO SHOOW (Dec.10)
(2) Graduation OMG. Tuesday the 21st of OCtober.
(3) End of all my exams 17th of December.
(4) Holiday to the Philippines with Lily :D:D - boracay my baby... i know you missed me but I'll be back soon.
(5) I get to see my best mates. Anne man... i effing miss you.
(6) The enter scores are coming out 5 days after i celebrate my birthday!! OMG.

| La Wishlist |

/* Laptop (my old one died ages ago by the way, it was such a sad moment as i scream in my head " WHYYYY!!!!! why in the middle of year 12!!!? WHYY WHYYYY")
/* Digital Camera - well i dont really need it, but it would be nice to have one :D
/* Electronic Organizer... -_- i know it's geeky.
/* Nintendo DS - I want the RED ONE
/* New bathers. hehehe
/* Motorola Hiptop.
/* the new ipod nano. - the blue one.
/* A grotesque pug.

| Myspace |

I updated my profile. hehe. new layout. It's purple. it's cute. heheh.